During Christmas 2006 I was busy ripping my (now ex) boyfriend to shreds over something that I don’t even recall. I mean it was so bad if it were broadcast, the FCC would forgo fines and simply take the network off the air. The fact that I can’t remember what I was so up in arms over is telling. All my anger and maliciousness was not over whatever was the subject at the moment. I was pissed off at something he did to me seven months prior. I wasn’t, during that Christmas argument, mad at him. I was mad at myself for letting him hurt me and not doing anything about it.
I’m so glad Black women are standing up and deciding to be a loud voice in the world but I fear some are so angry for the lack of fighting on our own behalf in the past that we’re ready to fight when a fist or even a booming voice, for that matter, are not necessary.
Some people don’t like to help the wounded animal or the drowning swimmer for a reason. SheCodes wrote about Toyota’s campaign to target Black women and I was floored, unable to comprehend how it got so “deep”. Automatically viewing someone as the enemy with horrible intentions is no better than assuming everyone is your friend. Not biting someone’s head off immediately is not synonymous with thinking they are an ally.
We must first be aware that the images, mind, souls, and bodies of Black women and girls is up for grabs. We must be willing to fight. We must also be knowledgeable of how to fight and when to fight.
Using the word “fight” is dangerous. We need another word, because “fight” is one tactic in the arsenal. The battle, the war is won by mentoring, encouraging, teamwork, educating, observing, communicating, advocating, and yes, when need be, fighting.
Toyota deserves communication. VIACOM deserves a fight. Black men who think Black women need to be held to high standards in order to aid in the improvement of Black female lives deserve communication. R. Kelly deserves a fight.
When we don’t know the difference, when we treat everyone like the enemy we’re in trouble. Thats when the angry Black woman profiles come into play. Thats when we can’t look for help from Black men who don’t harm Black women because they feel everything they say is an affirmation of their hate, disrespect or lack of understanding for the female struggle. Thats when we can’t educate corporations on corporate responsibility because they’ll say “Why bother you cant make them happy no matter what.”
Self-segregation can not be the unintended fallout of Black female empowerment.
When do we fight and when do we communicate?
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